Hi everybody! It's March 22, and I've just finished my first week of Chaplain Officer Basic Course training at Fort Jackson, SC. It's almost enough to cause whiplash coming from my training center in Mississippi to here.  Back there, we lived in barracks or in the field with the regular soldiers, eating MREs and wearing our helmets/body armor everywhere. Here, it's all chaplains, living in apartments and going to classes and inspecting our formal uniforms. I suppose both parts of the Army are necessary, but it's tough to go from one to the other so quickly, and to know how quickly I have to change back to a "going to the field, going to war" way of thinking in just a couple of weeks. 

On a happy note, Michelle is coming down to see me in just over a week! Hallelujah! It has been far, far too long already since we have seen each other. 

I've learned a lot about loving from a distance in the last two months. I always suspected it would be hard, and it is. But our love is still love. I still want the best for my wife, and she for me. We still chase the ideal of a relationship that is patient, and kind, and long-suffering, and one that will believe, bear, hope, and endure all things for the sake of each other. That's what the Bible (see 1 Cor 13) says love is supposed to be, and we are learning how hard it is to do those things at a distance, but by the sufficiency of God's grace (and your prayers and support) we keep love alive.

This challenge of love at a distance is also teaching me a lot about the challenge of loving God. Yeah, it's time to get theological for a minute. You think it's hard to love another person at a distance? We can at least e-mail and write letters and call and video message. How much harder is it to really truly be in love with a God whom we have never even seen?  

The quick church response, of course, is "Reading the Bible, praying, etc.," and that's the right answer, but let's not forget the incredible leap of faith involved in doing those things. When I read the Bible, I have to believe that a book written thousands of years ago, halfway around the world, is a message directly from God to me. When I pray, I have to believe that my words and my thoughts aren't just floating away, but they are actually heard and acted upon by someone who created the entire universe out of nothing. That kind of faith is neither obvious nor easy.

Even if I believe these things (which I do), prayer and reading the Bible are still, experientially, almost always commuication with God at a distance. Yes, I know the principle that the Holy Spirit is right there with me when I pray. But I have never experienced a face-to-face encounter with Jesus where He said directly to me, "Steve, I love you." Nor have I ever received a letter or e-mail addressed directly to me from God, telling me how much he cares for me.

The only way I know, I mean truly know that God loves me is because I believe it when someone else tells me it's true, and something inside me won't let me walk away. I can read that Jesus died on the cross for me, but that's not the same as seeing it in person. Our love with God most often feels like  love at a distance. As I try to love my wife and kids from a distance, I'm struck with how difficult that task is. Loving at a distance is hard; I think that truly loving God is harder still. Maybe Martin Luther was right when he said that by human ability, that kind of love isn't just hard; it's impossible. "I cannot by my own understanding believe in Jesus Christ", and we can't really love God the way He deserves to be loved. And so we are constantly dependent on the grace of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit, and it's only through that grace and power that God can take our imperfect love at a distance and turn it into a real relationship with Him that will be perfected in the life to come.

Enough deep thoughts. One of the problems with e-mail is that you write while you're thinking, so none of this is as completely formed as a sermon. Sorry if I'm not making any sense, but having seen the challenges of this long distance relationship, I'm just awed by anyone who truly loves Jesus in spite of all the obstacles and distance between us and Him.

And despite the distance between me and United, I want you to know that I still love my congregation and all of you reading this. I will keep loving you as long as my Lord gives me the strength.

God be good to you!
CH Steve Timm